Sunday Read: A pause for peace
On the road this week visiting my family
A moment apart
Forgive my delay today. I’ve been on the road this week visiting my family in Richmond, Virginia. I’m fortunate to have a wonderfully big family and another generation already growing up. I get to visit them all when I want, and anytime I’ve got meetings in DC as a bonus. It’s the best business perk to see these amazing young men and women growing and building their own families and careers.
On Friday my sons and I shared another ODESZA moment with the release of their film ‘The Last Goodbye Cinematic Experience’ in theaters for a limited release. We converted another kid to the fold.
Each morning I take a walk in and around this beautiful city on the James River and marvel at the natural beauty sprinkled amongst the urban growth.
I’m reminded how important it is to just pause. I’ve led a pretty challenging life at times. Over the years in times of trouble I’ve found myself just sitting and wallowing in the difficulty. From loss of loved ones, to loss of work, to relationship changes I will end up just sitting in a chair for a moment and spiral into despair.
Last week my therapist told me that I need to learn that when I find myself in in one of those moments I need to flip the script. Not to wallow but to savor. Not to see darkness but to see shadow. Not to see a downward slope but a pause on the upward climb.
When I’m hiking I will frequently stop and soak up the moment. A dear friend taught me from her yoga training a few years ago that I needed to learn to ‘Be here now.” As I mentioned in my post about walking, I don’t rush my walks or hikes. I stop and take the moment. I take many moments to just be there.
So, I’m learning to take those moments of mental downshifting and see them as a moment to be here now. To soak up the joy and fortune I have in my life. This weekend that’s been flock of osprey’s working the rapids or talking to my oldest grandson about his Pre-Kindergarten school program. It’s listening to my two sons absolutely bust each others balls relentlessly while we laugh until it hurts.
Flip your script
As I said last week on July 4th. The moment we face is going to be difficult. We face opponents who relish the suffering of our fellow Americans. People who quote Hitler and are defended instead of punished. Ideologies that believe we should go back to a time of sexism, racism, and bigotry as some idyllic goal. There will be setbacks and moments of despair.Don’t take the bait. Take a moment to pause and relish what you’ve done and what you’ve got.
Then move forward in peace. Take a moment to savor the journey then get back to the path.
Notes:
If you haven’t caught this week’s podcast it’s a really good one with former U.S. Army Europe commanding general Lt. General (Retired) Ben Hodges.
I think having emotional intelligence and being able to take those pauses to readjust our thinking are key to the pro-democracy movement. For me the key word was gratitude. I carried a lot of anger and grievance with me for most of my life because of some things I lived through as a kid, but thankfully I met the right people and they taught me to focus on the gratitude I feel for the things I have, not wallow in bitterness for the things I lost. It changed my life, and it finally allowed me to look beyond myself. I wanted to share this gratitude with others, and that's why I started trying to get involved in improving our society. I was so damn miserable before, and now that I've largely managed to get past that I want to share my newfound joy and appreciation for life with others, just as others originally shared it with me. The Republican party as it stands is run on grievance, and gratitude is its polar opposite. If only a few of these rich billionaires would take a moment to appreciate what they've been given in life, maybe they'd spend a bit less time trying to take everything from everyone else.
Thanks. This was my moment to reflect and savor.