Sunday Read: The 'Oldest' Fan
Chasing your joy even when it baffles everyone you know
Not every bucket list is the same
I was thinking about the crazy journey of my life today while reflecting on a trip I took with my son a couple of weeks ago just before Father’s Day. My father passed in 2010 after a long, full, but sometimes challenging life. In the end, like many of the Greatest Generation, he had set aside many of his dreams to focus on his duty to his family and career before his health kept him from making many of those personal hopes come true.
I made a commitment to follow a different path in this new phase of my life. Last week I told you about my commitment to better my health through walking and taking better care of myself. If you’ve followed me for a while you know about my mental health journey over the last several years as well.
I am just now finally of an age and place in my life where I can do many of the things, I had dreamed of but set aside for my career and the raising of my kids. I’m at a point to chase the path’s I had seen ahead but not taken. I’ve got a partner who says “why not go?” For ages I had always wanted to be able to hop a plane to a distant place to hike up a mountain when I get there or get back to flying again. To seek art and culture in new places. To go.
This past month several of those paths collided as my youngest son and I headed to Montreal to tour, celebrate and once again see our favorite musical artists. That artist is an Electronic Dance Music group named ODESZA perform and I’m usually one of the oldest people in the audience.
ODESZA is currently on their stadium ‘Last Goodbye’ tour and hitting the summer festival circuit where they have become one of the top acts in the country. Our trip to Montreal was my third concert on this tour and fifth time seeing them in the last five years. While I am not always the oldest fan at the shows, I am positive I’m close to it.
My friends are always so dumbfounded when I tell them I am a super fan of an EDM group. It’s always the same question: why is a middle-aged man following an EDM duo around the world?
Easy, because I can.
Happenstance
I stumbled onto ODESZA through pure coincidence and timing. Five years ago, my former wife was in Miami on business. My youngest son and I decided to tag along and enjoy one of our favorite city’s while she was there.
One day the radio played a single from a group I’d never heard of named ODESZA. Hunter popped up telling us that he had seen them at the Electric Forest festival just the summer before and that the show was absolutely insane. It was rare to hear one of their songs on the radio, but it was Sirius/XM’s alternative channel.
Later that afternoon as I picked up my wife the announcer said that if you were in Miami, you should go grab tickets because ODESZA was in town. That’s a coincidence, and sure enough there were still good seats. My son was shocked and happy to go.
As we drove downtown, he was a little anxious. He was explaining that I might not dig the music. It was electronic and synthesized made for dancing and “vibing out” as he so eloquently put it. But I love live music no matter what it was and grew up on the Art Rock movement of Genesis and Rush, so I promised to keep an open mind.
My mind was opened immediately by dazzling lights and special effects like I’d ever seen in a concert with a stage backed by massive screens rotating with digital animations and art tied to each song. As the show opened an 8-piece drumline marched on stage backed by a trumpet and trombone players on risers. The two DJ’s working briskly through a set of songs like nothing I’d ever heard. It was mesmerizing and heart pounding.
I was hooked.
Sometimes music just speaks to you at a perfect moment and that was that moment. I was going through the early stage of my mental health recovery journey unpacking my decades of dealing with PTSD and Survivors Guilt. My marriage of 23-years was a casualty of my difficulties, and my company was feeling the pressure of my rocky road while I became more vocal in my political beliefs risking all of the above.
ODESZA burst into my life at that moment.
More
I wanted more right away. I quickly scored tickets to another show in New Jersey and my two youngest and I made our way up to see them just weeks before the end of their tour. Then there was this whole global pandemic thing. I had to shut down my business, finalize a divorce, and have the good fortune to find a new life, new partner and work that mattered.
Through it all ODESZA was the soundtrack.
During the pandemic they released a hopeful collaboration with another artist called BRONSON then finally a new album of their own in July of last year. Immediately my son and I started hovering online to see when there would be a tour. They hail from close to Seattle and when they announced a three-night kickoff my girlfriend and I manned two computers to see who got them first. We scored seats on opening night just a couple of dozen yards from the stage.
My son and I took time to hike in Olympic National Park and savor the city between the electric and even more expansive concert itself in July. Then I got to bring my girlfriend and her sons into the ODESZA fold in St. Louis on a gorgeous September night. When I grabbed tickets for two more concerts in the tour, she may have thought she was with a lunatic.
Fateful timing
If you’ve never been to Montreal in the summer, it’s a beautiful slice of Europe right in North America and only a short plane trip away. We spent the week wandering from festival to museum and had incredible seats for the concert. His three years of French in high school 8 years ago did not help us but I got to hike up Mount Royal and wander the city with ease.
We made our way to the venue for our fifth time seeing the band. While waiting between opening acts I introduced myself to some fellow ‘olds’ in the row nearby only to discover they were the parents of singer Charlie Houston who is touring with the band. My son walked up as we chatted somewhat dumbfounded how I seem to always land in these situations.
On Friday we headed home after a challenging trip through security and airline delays, we sat in a bar at the airport just decompressing and savoring a great week. Then his eyes went wide as saucers and he started saying, “Fred...Fred…Fred…” I turned to see what the issue was and in walked Clayton Knight and Harrison Mills, better known as ODESZA.
“Huh. I’ll be damned.”
I’m not known for shyness so, I jumped up and introduced us subsequently chatting with them for about five minutes as they graciously accommodated our unadulterated excitement after years of saying “it would be so cool to meet the guys sometime.” They assured me that I am not their “oldest fan.” We asked to get a picture and ran off to catch our plane. A perfect coda to a strange journey.
I’ve been joking with my podcast producer that I need to convince them to let use one of their songs for our intro but forgot to ask at the time. Perhaps next time. In the meantime, the long, strange journey continues, and we both have fond memories of meeting the two young men that created the soundtrack of my recent journey.
The lesson is to just follow your joy. Don’t put off dreams because people around you think they are crazy or it’s ‘not the right time.’ I’ve seen far too many people move on from this life leaving a bucket list with very few lines crossed out. Go to the mountain. Dance joyously in the crowd even if it means you’re the oldest person. No one will care and you’ll carry that memory with you forever.
Notes:
I hope you enjoyed this latest Sunday Read and would consider upgrading to a paid subscription. You will get special access to the podcast early and special events. I’ll be hosting another monthly Zoom for paid subscribers soon so I hope you’ll consider helping me support this effort.
The latest ‘On Democracy’ show is a jaw dropping conversation with reporter and award-winning author Jeff Sharlet on his most recent book ‘The Undertow: Scenes from a Slow Civil War.’ I hope you’ll check it out.
Have a wonderful week.
Indeed Fred. That’s why I’m leaving my old life behind and moving out of this crazy country. I fought the early battles so my fires are almost banked now. I’m moving to a country that actually likes it’s seniors and celebrates them. So I’m beginning to dance again and relearn my Spanish. Life works if you work it.
There's a freedom that comes with aging that no one tells us about. Freedom to do the things we want to, when we want to. Somehow things that seemed impossible when we were younger (there's no time, can't get away from work, it's not the best use of my time, I have family/work obligations....) become possible. The things that kept us from doing them before still exist but as we age we see, and feel, the value of doing them anyway. Thank you for this post and the reminder to do the things that fill our lives with joy and value!